El Diablo, El Dead-O

John A. Quayle blueoval57 at VERIZON.NET
Wed Aug 6 19:50:54 MDT 2008


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  Glenn Beck: Dirt Bag finally Dead

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*August 6, 2008 - 13:12 ET*

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GLENN: A little mariachi music, please.

(Mariachi music playing).

GLENN: Oh, now I'm back in the mood. Ah. How do you say this guy's name? 
Jose? Jose Ernesto. What?

STU: Medalin', medallion.

GLENN: Jose Ernesto medalin'? I kind of like the fact that I keep 
getting his name wrong. Medellin? Medellin! He's been executed. I'll 
pause for a minute if you have to pull over and wipe a tear from your 
eye. Supreme Court of Texas turned down their last ditch appeal. And as 
you can tell, we're all broken up about it here. We feel really, really 
super, super bad that somebody comes into our country illegally and 
kills a couple of American teenagers, rapes them brutally and then we 
put them to death. Kind of makes me want to quote Davy Crockett today, 
when he was standing in he was standing in congress and he was a little 
pissed off. He looked at all of the people in congress and he said, you 
know what? You can all go to hell; I'm going to Texas.

By the way, just some fun facts for you here. It's from the LA Times. 
40% of all LA County workers, 40%. Remember Los Angeles County has 10.2 
million people. 40% of all the workers in LA County are working for cash 
and not paying taxes. Sounds to me like somebody's not paying their fair 
share. How do you, how do you hold LA County together when 40% of the 
people are not paying taxes? Oh, that's right, you don't. 95% of 
warrants for murder in Los Angeles are for illegal aliens. 75% of the 
people on the most wanted list in Los Angeles are illegal aliens. Over 
two thirds of all births in Los Angeles county are to illegal alien 
Mexicans. Do we have any sad what was that sad mariachi music? Yeah, 
it's from the LA Times. Stu's just asking me, do you have the yeah, LA 
Times.

(Slow mariachi music playing).

GLENN: See, this is kind of like, oh. Nearly 35% of all inmates in 
California detention centers are Mexican nationals here illegally. Over 
300,000 illegal aliens in Los Angeles County are living in garages. 
Isn't this the same song we just played?

DAN: Believe it or not, no.

GLENN: Go back to the other song that we just played. I think it's 
exactly the same song. I think we're being ripped off by mariachi bands. 
I think they only know one song. This is the same song. Did you switch 
songs or is this

DAN: This is La, La Marina Demacopoulos.

GLENN: Oh, I wonder if it's about Sophia Coppola when she wrecked her 
dad's last movie.

DAN: The other one was Silverio.

GLENN: Play the other one. This is the happy one. Now play the sad one. 
You did change them. I can't believe that.

DAN: Yeah.

GLENN: Wow. Sound exactly alike except this part. You're like, oh, I 
wonder what's going to happen. Oh, Marie's gone? Where is the love of my 
life, Maria. Oh, who cares. Look who's just come in. Oh, yes. Look how 
lovely she appears on the terrace, the white linen curtains billowing 
in, and I can see the silhouette of her body through the sheer white 
dress that she's wearing. Yes, it's Margarita. Ya ya ya.

The FBI reports that half of all gang members and if you are in 
Philadelphia, sorry to confuse you, that's the same as a loose group. 
Half of all gang members in Los Angeles are most likely illegal aliens 
from south of the border. Nearly 60% of all occupants of HUD properties 
are illegal. Let me say that one again. Your federal dollars at work. 
Nearly 60% of all occupants of HUD properties are illegal. 21 radio 
stations in Los Angeles are now all Spanish speaking. In LA County, 5.1 
million people speak English. Listen to this. LA County, 5.1 million 
speak English. 3.9 speak Spanish. Wait a minute. There's 10.2 million 
people in the county. Hmmm. I wonder what the rest of them speak. I'm 
sure that no one of this is anything to worry about. I'm sure because 
you know what happens? Can you imagine all the, you know, illegal aliens 
come here and, you know, they just whatever. Life is going to be living 
at a Chi Chi's. No, it will be. We'll have great food. Nobody will be 
able to understand what you're asking for, and you'll hear this music 
all the time. Yi yi yi. I mean, who doesn't want that. Can anybody tell 
I'm in a mood today? 888 727 BECK, it's 888 727 BECK.

(Break)

GLENN: Otherwise known as El Diablo. A little mariachi music. We 
executed a dirtbag in Texas last night. Normally I'm not real happy 
about executions. This one, I don't know. I really tried to get CNN to 
hire a mariachi band for tonight's broadcast. For some reason they won't 
open up the purse strings. Stu, could you do me a favor? Can you find 
out how much a mariachi band there's got to be a ton of them here in New 
York. Somebody's going to want exposure or something. How much a 
mariachi band cost, I just might hire one just accidentally kind of, 
whoops, walks into the studio in the middle of the show.

STU: I think we can look into that.

GLENN: Oh, jeez. Is this going to be another pitchfork thing? We don't 
have to mail them.

STU: I don't think we should mail mariachi band members. I don't think 
that's a good idea at all, but I think

GLENN: There's something else somebody what is something else somebody 
mailed in and the mail room was also pissed at me. It wasn't pitchforks, 
the torch oh, somebody mailed in tar and feathers.

GLENN: I don't think it really wasn't a good idea. The tar was leaking 
by the time it got to the mail room. They called down: Are you asking 
for tar and feathers now? "Glenn's not here. Please leave a message. 
Beep." We know that's you. "Don't know what you're talking about. If 
you'd like to speak to somebody in Latin, press 1."

STU: If I habla Inglés, I wouldn't be playing mariachi music.

GLENN: Inglés sounds good, doesn't it? Habla Inglés? Doesn't that sound 
good? Could you pour some Inglés sauce on that? I'd like to have let me 
see. I get a box of your mini Inglés, please, like one of those.

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